Breaking: Israel Dismantles, World's Problems End (update 3)

Oh, hey: and about the blather 'n' swill that there are "no homosexuals in Iran" (graphic photos)?

Update: the wave of cheers and applause by Columbia University students to Ahmadinejad's speech leave me with an appalling sense of nausea, revulsion and despair.

Words. Fail. Me.

"...the new Iranian President, Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, has kicked off a popular "Iran-loves-Jews" campaign that will include a sensitive re-writing of the laws to accommodate religions other than Islam. He explained, "With the Zionist entity out of the way, the Iranian government will tone down its violent and threatening rhetoric, dismantle its nuclear program, and stop funding Hezbollah and other terrorist groups. As a matter of fact, I might even resign my position and award the presidency to someone else. Do you think Schwarzenegger is available?"

"A spokesperson for Hezbollah stated that Iran's proposal wouldn't matter. "We don't need the funding because we no longer have any reason to exist. We disposed of our weapons, and will now re-focus on opening a chain of pizzerias. You just can't get decent pizza around here, and we're going to change that."

"He was joined by a former high-ranking member of Hamas: "Yeah, we also pretty much accomplished what we wanted. We'll get together for reunions now and then, but otherwise, we'll just settle down into normal lifestyles. You know... mortgage, house, bowling, PTA meetings..."

Read the rest here.

Columbia University President Lee C. Bollinger's introductory remarks.

(Yes, this is a segment of a previous post - but what with Iranian leader Mahmoud Ahmadinejad speaking at Columbia, at the United Nations and the National Press Club, etc, well, "the 'troofer' shall set you free," right? Oh, wait... or was that "work shall set you free?" Well, no doubt the Iranian leader has his own thoughts about that).

Click here for more posts about Iran.

Ahmadinejad: Handing out heaven's key

Does you remember this phenomenon, during the Iran-Iraq war?:

"In pondering the behavior of Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, I cannot help but think of the 500,000 plastic keys that Iran imported from Taiwan during the Iran-Iraq War of 1980-88. At the time, an Iranian law laid down that children as young as 12 could be used to clear mine fields, even against the objections of their parents. Before every mission, a small plastic key would be hung around each of the children’s necks. It was supposed to open for them the gates to paradise.

“In the past,” wrote the semi-official Iranian daily Ettela’at, “we had child-volunteers: 14-, 15-, and 16-year-olds. They went into the mine fields. Their eyes saw nothing. Their ears heard nothing. And then, a few moments later, one saw clouds of dust. When the dust had settled again, there was nothing more to be seen of them. Somewhere, widely scattered in the landscape, there lay scraps of burnt flesh and pieces of bone.” Such scenes could henceforth be avoided, Ettela’at assured its readers. “Before entering the mine fields, the children [now] wrap themselves in blankets and they roll on the ground, so that their body parts stay together after the explosion of the mines and one can carry them to the graves.
(...)
"The western media showed little interest for the Basiji – perhaps because journalists could not be present during the hostilities or perhaps because they did not believe the reports. Such disinterest has persisted to this day. The 5000 dead of Saddam Hussein’s poison gas attack on the Kurds of Halabja have remained in our memory. History has forgotten the children of the minefields.

"Today, however, Ahmadinejad appears in public in his Basiji uniform. During the war, he served as one of the Basiji instructors who turned children into martyrs."

This is what the man who is to speak at Columbia University directly, personally represents.

Read the rest.

'McBreak-Fast' & American soul food for thought

This so reminds me of what I've been saying for a while here in the US: Jews should, along with the traditions, foods, customs, etc., push the "green, zero-carbon footprint 52-weeks-a-year + holidays" side of observance to gentile society. It would be a win-win situation.

Image courtesy Bangitout.com

So well said:

As Yom Kippur begins at sunset this evening, I'd like to invite the rest of the country to join right in with your Jewish neighbors in marking the Day of Atonement. Pull up a chair and have a little nothing to eat, and let's all get started.

From shortly after the end of this afternoon's Panthers game until just before tomorrow's first Simpsons rerun, Jews will be observing a millennia-old tradition of fasting, sober reflection, and rigorous self-appraisal. Sounds fun, doesn't it? I think it's time we made it a national holiday.

(...) Yom Kippur is a day of introspection and not eating, and if there was ever a culture in need of introspection and not eating, we're it. Raised on hedonism and credit cards, Americans make every day a holiday and every meal a feast, to the point of devaluing actual holidays and feasts. We have name-branded golden calves and a television show called American Idol. At the same time, we are encouraged to think of ourselves as victims, not to take responsibility for ourselves. We could all use some of the dermabrasion for the soul that Yom Kippur promises.

Read it all.

Yom Kippur: Very, Very Fast Forward (wicked cool video)

Why "holidays" in Israel really aren't like anywhere else:


I'll try real hard to envision this speeded-up version of the fast, ohh, about the last two hours of the
s

l

o

w fast tomorrow afternoon...

And to any and all - worldwide - that I may have offended or hurt with this blog in any way, shape or form, please forgive me.

Tzom kal - an easy, "fast" fast to all - and remember K-Mart shoppers: Saturday night is woodworking night:


And then, of course, there's this:
A buncha' guys gettin' their groove thang on, at "hakafot Shniyot" on Simchat Torah, in Jerusalem's Liberty Bell park, 2005. (Dave Bender)

And, finally, here's a cheat sheet for the clueless, but curious.

Maccabi TA takes on the NY Knicks (don't laugh!)

From David Brinn & Co. at Israelity:

Next month the action goes down at Madison Square Garden when The New York Nicks play Maccabi Elite Tel Aviv in a game of hoops that promises to be exciting.

No, the Israel team wasn’t catapulted into the NBA in some sort of parallel universe happenstance.

It’s a fundraiser game during Hoops and Dreams Week and all the proceeds will go to American Friends of Migdal Ohr. Migdal Ohr [Lighthouse] is Israel’s largest youth village providing homes, educations and opportunity for some 6,500 young people.

Read about the game and the village in this story.

All bets are on the kids…

Jane's: Syria, Iran & nerve gas against Israel

Iranian military launches missile salvo during
maneuvers earlier this year.

From Janes Magazine via The Jerusalem Post:

"Proof of cooperation between Iran and Syria in the development and proliferation of weapons of mass destruction was brought to light Monday in a Jane's Magazine report that dozens of Iranian engineers and 15 Syrian officers were killed in a July 23 accident in Syria.

According to the report, cited by Channel 10, the joint Syrian-Iranian team was attempting to mount a chemical warhead on a Scud missile when the explosion occurred, spreading lethal chemical agents, including sarin nerve gas and VX gas.

The factory was created specifically for the purposes of altering ballistic missiles to carry chemical payloads, the magazine report claimed."

Meawhile, Israeli President Shimon Peres opines:

"I estimate that the tension between Syria and Israel has gone down, we are ready for direct peace negotiations with Syria,"

Hey - it's jes' me talkin' here, but, WTF?

Click here for previous posts on Syrian, Iranian, Israeli tensions.

French FM: 'prepare for war with Iran'

From Haaretz:

The world must "must prepare for the worst" - including the possibility of war - in light of the Iranian nuclear crisis, French Foreign Minister Bernard Kouchner said Sunday.

"We have to prepare for the worst, and the worst, sir, is war," Kouchner said in an interview on LCI television and RTL radio.

...and about that supposed Israeli airstrike against Syrian targets?

"I think it would be unusual for Israel to conduct a military operation inside Syria other than for a very high value target, and certainly a Syrian effort in the nuclear weapons area would qualify," [former United Nations ambassador John] Bolton told Channel 10 in an interview broadcast Sunday.

"I think this is a clear message not only to Syria, I think it's a clear message to Iran as well, that its continued efforts to acquire nuclear weapons are not going to go unanswered," Bolton said.

Background: former IDF strategist, Dr. Eran Lerman, detailed these very issues - Iran and Syria - in an exclusive interview some nine months ago. Although understandably cautious in his assessments, I think he fairly nailed the issues involved even then.

Previous Israel At Level ground posts about Iran and Israel.

Atlanta Morning (original photography)

Atlanta Morning

A foggy August morn' along I-75 in Atlanta, as the last wisps of fog burned off among the downtown skyscrapers, and rush-hour motorists drove on, unawares.

I shot this on the way to work. Luckily, just after my turn-off, I managed to pull over and grab my camera out of the trunk. Lot's of Photoshopping, to retrieve the look and feel of the moment.

Freakin' cool indie Israeli rock - in English (video)

Ok, this is cool - and "wis' no Ez-rae-lie ak-sent."

L.A. Times: "This band from Israel covers some of the same ground as Coldplay with the kind of sing-along choruses that could appeal to a large audience. Singer Ohad Eilam has an accessible sincerity and, in "Hidden Thieves," when the keening guitar enters on the final chorus, providing a diversion from the center of focus (the piano) one can imagine a concert hall of swaying bodies."

Their clean-cut image matched with their talent appealed to Israel's Foreign Ministry, which in a way has chosen missFlag as cultural ambassadors for Israel. According to the band, it was the Israeli consul in Los Angeles which helped them out with initial contacts in the music industry and media.

"I think it is really down-to-earth stuff... nothing political like one would expect from Israel. The songs are about relationships, hopes, loves and sadness and the things that everyone goes through," Assayas told ISRAEL21c.

RoshHashanaShabbat: four nights, seven festive meals

As the Jewish world enter the Rosh Hashana eat-a-thon:

...and don't forget "grazing" the cookie table, and the herring and shnapps at the after-services-Kiddush...

Shana Tova!