Israeli gov't to Palestinians: My tunnel's bigger than yours

"Hoooly City, Robin! Iran's launching nuke-tipped Shihab 3 missiles at Israel, Fatah's firing Kassams and mortars out of Bethlehem at Gilo, and Palestinian drones and hang gliders have been spotted swooping in from Ramallah!"

"Whaddya' we gonna' do, Batman?"

"Quick! Let's take the secret elevator down to the Bat Tunnel, and get the hell outtahere - first!"

"According to the Jerusalem weekly Yerushalayim, the government is spending tens of millions of shekels on an underground bunker and escape tunnel to be used by the prime minister and senior members of the government in case of emergency. A special elevator shaft has reportedly been completed under the area scheduled for future construction of the new building that will house the Prime Minister's Office and official residence in Kiryat Hale'om (the National Precinct).

"In an emergency, the (Bat) elevator would drop the prime minister, senior government officials (and whoever is a "friend of a friend,") underground to a special reinforced bunker, complete with a situation room equipped with sophisticated communications and other equipment, in which the government can continue to meet and function.

"In addition, the shaft connects to an underground escape tunnel, where vehicles will be stored, in case the prime minister or other senior officials have to make a speedy exit from the city. The western exit of the escape tunnel (which the newspaper claims has already been built) is located in Emek Arazim, adjacent to the Route One exit from the city."

You think I'm making this stuff up, right? Wrong, boy blunder.